When do you feel most loved by your significant other? Can you pinpoint specific times, instances, or scenes where love seems to surround you? In this blog series, we are exploring how different people respond to and feel love. Knowing which of the 5 Love Languages your partner prefers ensures that you communicate your feelings in ways that speak loudest and most effectively to your special someone.
Even as small children, we develop our preferences of how we experience love. A child shouting from the playground, “Mommy, watch me!” or “Watch what I can do, Daddy!” is likely going to be the adult who values words of affirmation from their spouse. They feel secure and loved when someone verbally compliments and praises their efforts. They thrive on encouraging words when they are feeling unsteady. It gives them renewed strength when someone they love and admire affirms their abilities.
Here are three tips on how to show your love and adoration for your words of affirmation lover.
Say it Loud, Say it Proud
1. People whose primary love language is words of affirmation treasure the verbalization of feelings for not only them but the world to hear. They find comfort in frequent positive reinforcement. “I love you”, “I am proud of you”, “you are doing a great job” speaks directly to their heart. Tell them often how much they mean to you and how special they are in all areas of their life.
2. Take Pen to Paper (or Fingers to Screens)
Unexpected love notes in the form of text messages, post-it notes on lunches, or cards in the mail are greatly appreciated. It doesn’t have to be much, but a simple acknowledgment of love and adoration goes a long way. Whether you write them handwritten notes or send an email from work, just remind them of how incredible you think they are as often as you can.
3. Be Mindful in Your Speech
If your partner prefers you to communicate your love for them through words of affirmation, it is important to be mindful of how you speak to them. For example, non-constructive criticism can be confusing, and undue criticism can be damaging to not only your relationship but also to the person. Your S.O. appreciates gentle tones to show respect and compassion. Emotionally harsh words spoken in loud tones can cause them to feel inadequate and unloved. Be thoughtful in how you speak to them.
It is important to mindfully think about your partner. You know them best. Look for their areas of insecurity and find ways to positively reinforce them. Find verbal and written ways to lift them up not just in times of stress or sadness, but always.
For more suggestions on how to mindfully affirm a Words of Affirmation lover, contact us!